Thats a good point, but in my defense, I’d argue thst an alcoholic just is a manipulative narcissist, a flavor of them, just with worse memory and coordination.
the action of being an addict is very selfish. And I have no doubt some alcoholics or other types of addicts are narcissistic. Often alcoholics are self medicating for another issue such as depression which might fit a different mental reason.
For our sake and purpose here : Results are the same. Still impacts the family just as much with a selfish action.
Just if we were to peel off from this and look at what drives them and how they might try to fix themselves might be a different approach cuz what they are masking can be various illnesses.
Maybe thats not quite the preferred nomenclature, but yes, its very much worth considering what drives people to addiction, how to potentially help them… but the flip side of that is that addicts tend to be various kinds of awful to the people around them.
You’d ideally need a holistic solution to the entire situation, but that’s often very difficult to pull off, in practice.
Absolutely. For sure. I’ve seen it once in my life. The alcoholic got help, It was one of the most beautiful experiences I’ve ever grown through with someone. It was then I learned as much as it’s an area of effect disease, it has an area of affect of growth with the person in recovery. And I learned a great deal of compassion for what they learned about themselves and their struggle - In their case they were self medicating because in their youth ADHD and dyslexia was not treated.
I mean ngl, it would have been great to not have their abusive alcoholism imposed on me in the first place as a child.
But I can’t hang onto resentment about that, cuz I can’t undo the past, I can’t undo what they did and they came through in the end anyways. I’m capable of forgiving and compassion that they are just another human with struggles getting frustrated about being abandoned.
Thats a good point, but in my defense, I’d argue thst an alcoholic just is a manipulative narcissist, a flavor of them, just with worse memory and coordination.
the action of being an addict is very selfish. And I have no doubt some alcoholics or other types of addicts are narcissistic. Often alcoholics are self medicating for another issue such as depression which might fit a different mental reason.
For our sake and purpose here : Results are the same. Still impacts the family just as much with a selfish action.
Just if we were to peel off from this and look at what drives them and how they might try to fix themselves might be a different approach cuz what they are masking can be various illnesses.
Thats a good point too.
Addict as victim vs Addict as victimizer.
Maybe thats not quite the preferred nomenclature, but yes, its very much worth considering what drives people to addiction, how to potentially help them… but the flip side of that is that addicts tend to be various kinds of awful to the people around them.
You’d ideally need a holistic solution to the entire situation, but that’s often very difficult to pull off, in practice.
Absolutely. For sure. I’ve seen it once in my life. The alcoholic got help, It was one of the most beautiful experiences I’ve ever grown through with someone. It was then I learned as much as it’s an area of effect disease, it has an area of affect of growth with the person in recovery. And I learned a great deal of compassion for what they learned about themselves and their struggle - In their case they were self medicating because in their youth ADHD and dyslexia was not treated.
I mean ngl, it would have been great to not have their abusive alcoholism imposed on me in the first place as a child.
But I can’t hang onto resentment about that, cuz I can’t undo the past, I can’t undo what they did and they came through in the end anyways. I’m capable of forgiving and compassion that they are just another human with struggles getting frustrated about being abandoned.